“Can You Please Dye Your Hair Again?” — Why I’m Not Going Back

(Yep… someone actually Asked me That.)

Well… at least I got a please this time 🙃

I wish I could say I was shocked, but the truth is, when you decide to go gray, you’re basically putting a spotlight on how uncomfortable people still are with women aging… unapologetically.

Someone recently looked at me, smiled, and said:
“I really can’t get used to you like this. Can you please dye your hair again?”

It used to shake me… now it doesn’t

There was a time I might’ve laughed nervously and taken that comment to heart.
I might’ve stood in front of the mirror later that night, tugging at my silver strands… wondering if I’d made a mistake.

But not anymore.

Now? I let it roll off my shoulders. Because I know who I am.
And more importantly, I know why I chose this path.

(If you’re just starting out, I wrote about the first time my grays really showed up — and how I surprised myself by not panicking. Read that here once you’re done with this post.)

More than hair… it’s healing

This gray hair journey isn’t just about appearance. It’s about choosing authenticity over approval. It’s about loosening the grip of beauty standards that were never really ours to begin with.

We’ve been taught for decades that youth is the peak… that beauty has a time limit… that gray hair on women is something to cover, hide, or fix.

But let’s be honest… who decided that? Was it beauty companies trying to sell us the next “fix”? Was it the magazines we grew up flipping through… always showing us what was “in” and what needed covering up? Or maybe it was passed down quietly from our mothers and grandmothers, who were taught to dye, conceal, and maintain because that’s what they believed they had to do.

It’s no one person’s fault… but it’s all of ours to question now.

And if those messages were learned over time… we can unlearn them too.

The most beautiful thing I wear now is peace

Letting my grays grow in has taught me that confidence doesn’t come from fitting in.
It comes from being at peace with yourself.

It’s not always easy. But it is always worth it.

So no, I won’t be dyeing it again. Not to make someone else more comfortable. Not to smooth over someone else’s discomfort. Not even for a polite please.

I didn’t go gray to disappear.
I went gray to show up as I am… fully, freely, and finally.

Every step we take is a step toward our true selves.
Thanks for walking part of this path with me.
🩶 Meesh